I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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