Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

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(317): Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother. http://tfl.nu/z8j5

Replies (28) Good night (1716) Bad night (640)
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(614): View more from Ohio

so are u like ashamed lol?

(513): View more from Ohio

not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip

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(614): so are u like ashamed lol? (513): not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip http://tfl.nu/sr1n

Replies (17) Good night (815) Bad night (2332)
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(719): View more from Colorado

just survived the first fart of the relationship.

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(719): just survived the first fart of the relationship. http://tfl.nu/r3p3

Replies (15) Good night (4013) Bad night (762)
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(301): View more from Maryland

we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing

(1-301): View more from Maryland

that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome

(301): View more from Maryland

we agree. completely

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(301): we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing (1-301): that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome (301): we agree. completely http://tfl.nu/eynh

Replies (31) Good night (8405) Bad night (564)
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(870): View more from Arkansas

You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"

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(870): You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call" http://tfl.nu/7z02

Replies (29) Good night (9937) Bad night (847)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day

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(508): I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day http://tfl.nu/qyf0

Replies (30) Good night (3844) Bad night (997)
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(510): View more from California

I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk

(415): View more from California

yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts

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(510): I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk (415): yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts http://tfl.nu/5sxt

Replies (49) Good night (8391) Bad night (1204)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.

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(832): you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would. http://tfl.nu/dwd2

Replies (7) Good night (5211) Bad night (2459)
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(573): View more from Missouri

Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it

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(573): Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it http://tfl.nu/okq1

Replies (5) Good night (977) Bad night (2981)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.

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(337): I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe. http://tfl.nu/8iw1

Replies (13) Good night (2820) Bad night (1047)
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(225): View more from Louisiana

I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.

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(225): I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left. http://tfl.nu/d68g

Replies (24) Good night (3496) Bad night (1417)
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(812): View more from Indiana

I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.

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(812): I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand. http://tfl.nu/31me

Replies (6) Good night (1601) Bad night (569)
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(516): View more from New York

perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection

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(516): perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection http://tfl.nu/w4cf

Replies (8) Good night (560) Bad night (1733)
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(248): View more from Michigan

The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"

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(248): The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations" http://tfl.nu/0f04

Replies (4) Good night (1946) Bad night (511)
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(210): View more from Texas

I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.

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(210): I want to break his glasses with my pelvis. http://tfl.nu/5x22

Replies (10) Good night (1934) Bad night (475)

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