I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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