I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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