Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
