Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
