my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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