Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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