Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
