Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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