Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Randomize
