You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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