so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
