you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
