# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I have tasted many bathrooms
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
