So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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