How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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