what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
