I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
