If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
