All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
