he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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