I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
