This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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