I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
