At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
