Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
