It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
