You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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