Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
