what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
someone get that fucking seahorse.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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