Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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