It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
