You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
the condom got lost in my hair
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
