high people should be assigned attendants
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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