I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
