its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
