is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize