there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
