That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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