He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
