kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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