3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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