Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
