I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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