dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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