C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
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Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
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you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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