So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
