I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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