Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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