sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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